Fertilizer May 4, 2005Posted by Administrator in Blogging, Personal.
PREAMBLE: I understand that blogging is not a reliable substitute for journaling. . .it’s just too public.
However, it was my intent from the outset to treat the blog simply as a full online journal. Silly me. That is proving impossible to be both totally candid and maintain certain confidences that simply cannot be broken.
So, in an attempt to have my cake and eat it too, this short entry will be an attempt to use the blog as a half-donkeyed journal, in that I will be speaking somewhat obliquely. END OF PREAMBLE
Bob Geldof of Boomtown Rats and LiveAid fame sang the song incorrectly “TELL ME WHY I don’t like Mondays. . .”. The fertlizer day of the week is not Mondays, but Wednesdays. In my case, some of the bad cess comes about from a work schedule that is altered every Wednesday, where some of my workday that is normally reserved for managing work-related issues that arise daily instead gets used for staff meetings, yet I still have to get the daily grind issues resolved in MUCH LESS TIME. So, the day is almost programmed to be poor to begin with.
2 is the persistent refusal, despite the best efforts of our family, to sell our current, rather too-small house and move into a bigger one. The market is too flabby right now and that was just driven home to me again today in a simple but irritating fashion. (“Oh, it’s a nice house, and great yard, but it needs about $5000 worth of work in carpet and windows before WE could POSSIBLY live in it.”)
3. I screwed up my schedule and told my boss I could do some extra work for him tonight when in fact I cannot, and had to drop that bomb on him today with minimal notice. This is not the type of thing that hurts the performance review, but still looks bad.
4 is the killer. I received notice today that a person whom I dearly love has been given a preliminary diagnosis of a pernicious, chronic and potentially life-long illness. While this diagnosis is preliminary, and happily can usually be managed through medication, it nevertheless represents a huge heartache. . .one that is nearly debilitating in my case in that this person is one whom I love and feel a tremendous responsibility.
Why am I telling you this? I use the blog to journal. To provide, among other things, peeks into my life. So, now you have a peek. If you are Christian, I would beg you for your prayers regarding #4. If you aren’t, even “positive thoughts” would be welcome.