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Soviet of Seattle rediscovers phrenology, applies to Presidential race March 4, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Idiots, Soviet of Seattle.
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. . .will soon announce that using Phlogiston as a working theory of thermodynamics will solve the world energy crisis in a snap.

(For those of you who do not understand the theory of phrenology, it was a common discipline in the 19th century, where studying bumps on the human skull could allow for a clear determination about a person’s personality.  It was widely practiced and believed during much of the 1800s.)

 

Barack Obama: “His temples are slightly indented, which indicates that he may be compulsive about work, and needs regular exercise to de-stress. But it also shows he is highly disciplined, and that spirituality plays an important part in his life.

“His eyebrows show his tremendous drive and the ability to take on the difficult work … His lower eyelids indicate genuine care for other people. A mole near his nose indicates that this is a man with a special purpose in the world.”

Hillary Rodham Clinton: “Overall, the most impressive information seen in her face is how deeply she really cares about others and how she wants to help people; she views the country as one family. There are so many places on her face which reveal that her main motivation in her work is to help others. …

“The shape of her face shows tremendous strength … Hillary’s forehead indicates she’s very creative in problem-solving. … Her cheeks reveal both a strength and a challenge — her inherent desire to speak her mind. Her prominent cheeks are the feature that can make some men have a negative reaction to her, as subliminally they’ll feel she’s an overpowering and threatening woman.”

John McCain: “The most important feature on his face is his very heavy prominent jaw. But his jaw is not the strong, well-defined jaw that reflects good ‘roots of the tree’ — … the strong belief system. His jaw is quite massive and full. This shows firm values and beliefs, but more than that, it reveals someone who holds huge potential for anger and control.

“This feature, combined with his somewhat narrowed deep-set eyes show he is not so comfortable expressing his emotions, and he will need to suppress his feelings until be explodes into anger or upset.”

The Pacific Northwest, home of the most advanced thinking on earth.

HT: Mark Shea.

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