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Political Correctness Invades Safeco Field July 25, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Humor, Idiots, Soviet of Seattle, Sports, wtf?.
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Peanuts to be banned in two sections of Seattle’s Safeco field.

Words fail me, but they do not fail Intern Bill of The BigLead.

In case you’re worried about some people saying that you’re raising a bunch of completely sheltered, overmedicated freaks, we’re here to say “that’s OK!” Because we here at Safeco Field know that when you have a kid who is really just an obnoxious moron, we call it “Asperger’s Syndrome.” It saves you from the needless discomfort of actually disciplining your kids. When you have a girl who is just a little on the chunky side, we say that she’s got “Celiac Disease,” and she needs to watch her gluten intake. We wouldn’t want to call her fat, hide the ice cream, and strategically place issues of Seventeen magazine in her room, because that might not be good for her self-esteem. And finally, when your little vag-dumpling is so highly-medicated that he/she/or-whatever-gender-they’re-free-to-choose are walking around like Zach Braff in the 1st part of Garden State, they might be zombies and wearing weird eye makeup, but at least they won’t be offending anyone!

The Seattle Mariners! Last place in the standings, and last place in life! It’s called “SAFE-co Field” for a reason!

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Are Clay Bennett and David Stern Secret Lovers? July 9, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Idiots, Law, Soviet of Seattle, Sports.
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. . .or does Bennett have some incredible blackmail information on the NBA Commissioner?

Bennett began his “good faith” effort at keeping the Sonics in Seattle by demanding that government/taxpayers pony up $500 million to build a new palace in suburban Seattle.  That would be the richest of its kind in the nation.

Stern claimed that this had to happen for basketball to stay in Seattle, as KeyArena -despite having been remodeled to the specifications of the Sonics -is supposedly so inimicable to NBA owners basketball.  Stern claimed there was no other option, not even remodeling Key would do.

Then, as Seattle Gasbag Mayor Nickels looked for some way out of a lawsuit that most people were sure he would win going in -but in hiring incompetent attorneys screwed himself and the city-, and was agonizing over the fury of outraged hoops fans as the Sonics were hijacked to OKC, Stern then came oiling in and said that a $300 million remodel of Key would do the job.  Nickels, desperate for some sop to the voters in an election year, then took the $45 million from the smirking Bennett.

Stern backs Bennett in every instance.

NOW Bennett is facing the ex-owner of the Sonics, Howard Schultz in a tussle over ownership, claiming that Bennett did no exercise good faith in negotiating with the City.

Well, Schultz is probably correct.  But as Thomas More reminded us:

The world must construe according to its wits.  This court must construe according to the law.”

And in the law, “good faith” is one damned hard term to nail down.  We ALL know Bennett didn’t act in good faith.  You know it.  I know it.  Schultz, the trial lawyers, judges, David Stern, hell, even Clay Bennett knows it.  But they have a snowball’s chance in hell of proving that according to the law.

But that isn’t enough.  Either Bennett and Stern have been getting down in S&M clubs like the recently disgraced chief of F1 racing and they are all agog over one another, or Bennett reminded Stern of those compromising photographs or whatever he is using to leverage Stern and Stern has responded like a good lapdog.  The NBA is intervening in the Schultz lawsuit.

The NBA wants to intervene in former SuperSonics owner Howard Schultz’s bid to regain control of the team, claiming it would interfere with the stable operation of the franchise.

Schultz is trying to reverse his 2006 sale of the NBA franchise to Clay Bennett, claiming the Oklahoma City businessman failed to follow through on a promise to negotiate in good faith to keep the team in Seattle.

The league filed a motion Tuesday to intervene in Schultz’s lawsuit in Seattle’s federal court.

(snip)

That agreement included a clause that the deal would be broken and the team would return to Seattle if Schultz, the chairman of Starbucks Corp., were to prevail in this lawsuit, filed April 22.

(snip)

The NBA claims in its motion that the transfer of the franchise to a court-appointed receiver and a subsequent transfer back to Schultz would both be prohibited by the league’s constitution. (So the NBA trumps US civil law.  Fascinating -ed.)

The motion also claims that if a court-appointed receiver were to be appointed, the NBA’s constitution allows for the league’s owners to put that team “under the management and control” of commissioner David Stern.

“The relief requested by plaintiffs is entirely inconsistent with these reasonable and lawful regulations of the NBA, and the disposition of this action therefore threatens the ability of the League to protect its justifiable interests,” attorney Ralph Palumbo wrote in the motion.

The NBA also claims that Schultz’s ownership group signed a release as part of the league’s approval of the 2006 sale that prevented the former owners from suing Bennett’s Professional Basketball Club ownership group.

Stern left Seattle to twist in the wind, but whenever Clay Bennett needs help, Stern the Lapdog is right there to provide fellatio relief.

What is UP between those two?

Funniest Site EVER if you know about Seattle July 9, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Humor, Idiots, Soviet of Seattle.
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The Naked Loon. Rakes the sanctimony that oozes from the Soviet. Opening goodness. Act II.

H/T: Mark Shea.

Idiot gasbag folds, allows felonious assbucket to steal the Sonics UPDATED July 2, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Idiots, Soviet of Seattle, Sports.
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Nickels (gasbag mayor of Seattle) and Bennett (felonious assbucket) have agreed to a $75 million deal to allow the Sonics to bolt to OKC effectively pretty much immediately.

Clay Bennett has done it. He has stolen the Sonics and turned them into the OKC Raiders.

I had said previously that both of these guys suck. Nothing has changed.

UPDATE:

Lester Munson of espn.com:

Q: Why would Seattle settle? Why wouldn’t the city wait for the judge’s decision, hoping to keep the team for two years?

A: Before the six-day trial, Bennett was willing to pay $26 million to buy his way out of the lease. After the six-day trial, he increased his offer to $45 million. It could go up another $30 million in five years if the state of Washington authorizes at least $75 million in public funding to renovate KeyArena but Seattle is unable to obtain an NBA franchise of its own. Bennett increased his offer by nearly $20 million after watching both the city’s lawyers and his lawyers score some points in the trial. Bennett clearly thought there was a chance that he would be forced to stay in Seattle and was willing to pay a high price in settlement.

Although they had a powerful legal position in the language of the arena lease, mayor Greg Nickels and Seattle’s city council somehow reached the conclusion that $45 million was preferable to two years of lame-duck NBA basketball and $11 million in rent from Bennett. Most legal experts predicted that the city would have prevailed and could have held the team in Seattle for two years.

Nickels and the city hope that Seattle will somehow qualify for another NBA franchise. But, after arguing that no sum of money could replace two years of Sonics basketball, they gave away their team for a modest sum of money. It will become more of a political issue than a legal issue as Nickels and the council members face re-election.

Q: The settlement agreement includes a “negotiated statement” from NBA commissioner David Stern on “the future of professional basketball in Seattle.” What, if anything, does this mean?

A: If the choices are “meaningful” or “meaningless,” the Stern statement is meaningless.

Mayor Nickels and the city council needed something to try to show that their betrayal of Sonics fans was not a total betrayal. They needed something reassuring and hopeful in the face of what many fans thought was a disaster. The NBA was already involved in the discussions, assisting and advising Bennett on his exit from Seattle — given that, it was easy to ask Stern to say something for the fans in Seattle.

(snip)

The statement reiterates the position the NBA has argued since the controversy began. Seattle is, of course, a “first-class NBA city,” Stern said. It is so fine a city that its team is leaving for Oklahoma City.

Stern also repeated his demand for a $300 million renovation of KeyArena before the NBA will consider a return to Seattle. And he added that it must be funded in the next 18 months. Then, and only then, Stern says, the NBA will keep Seattle “informed” if there is a sale of a team, a relocation of a team or an expansion team.

Mayor Nickels will use the statement to defend his settlement, but that will be its only meaningful use.

Nickels is a gasbag who allowed himself to get played by Bennett, the Assbucket of the Year, while Stern, the main asskisser in this low-rent tragedy continues to pillory Seattle for not ponying up the requisite blackmail money.

There is NO ONE in this drama worth rooting for.

And more, really good stuff, from JA Adande, who is in a fine state of piss-off, while saying all the right things.

Henry Abbot.

The Soviet of Seattle is peopled by uncaring asshats July 2, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Creepiness, Cultural Pessimism, Idiots, Leviathan, Liberal Hypocrisy, Liberal self-loathing, Soviet of Seattle.
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Keep this statistic in mind -Metro Seattle went 65% Democratic in the 2004 Presidential race- when considering the oft-held tripe that liberals are more compasstionate. (Amusingly, I tried to find a quote about compassionate liberals on kos. Here’s what I found:

That’s right. Nothing.)

Big surprise. But let us allow the NetNuts their delusion that they really are the Party of Compassion (despite evidence here, here, and here, just for starters, that this idea is all a bunch of hooey). Here is some concrete proof that these are utter horsefeathers.

Driving home from work early Sunday, (State Trooper Kim) Triplett encountered an overturned SUV on Interstate 405 in Renton. Several people were injured, including a man who was trapped beneath the vehicle and gasping for breath.

Triplett parked on the freeway and tried to commandeer passing motorists to help her lift the vehicle off the man. Many ignored her pleas, driving through the accident scene as if it were an obstacle course, Triplett said.

It wasn’t until she stood in front of several vehicles and forced the drivers to stop that she was able to get enough help to lift the SUV off the injured man.

(snip)

Triplett was still in uniform and on her way home at the end of her 6 p.m. to 4 a.m. shift when the cars in front of her began braking and skidding on Interstate 405 just south of Highway 900, she said.

She saw a woman crumpled in the middle of the HOV lane, Triplett said. An injured girl sat nearby. In the right lane, a 1990 Ford Explorer lay on its side.

Cars kept pushing through the lane between them, driving over photographs, CDs and clothing that had been scattered when the SUV flipped over. Shattered glass glistened under their brake lights.

The accident had just happened. No one had even called 911, Triplett said.

When she got out of her car to help the woman, Triplett didn’t see the 18-year-old man trapped beneath the driver’s-side door of the Explorer. But then she heard him screaming.

She grabbed a bright-yellow emergency blanket from her patrol car and draped it over the woman so people wouldn’t hit her. She then crossed traffic to get to the pinned man.

“He was gasping and gurgling,” Triplett said. “He was in 40 seconds or so of losing his life.”

Triplett knew she couldn’t lift the SUV alone. She tried waving down cars, which were still passing slowly in the lane between the victims, but nobody stopped. Some people said, “Sorry, I’m late for the airport,” or told her they had to get to work as they drove by.

People were callous, Triplett said (no frickin’ duh -ed). One car brushed her leg as it passed.

(Snip)

“Finally, I decided to forcibly stop cars and ask people to get out and help me save this guy,” she said. “I basically stood in front of the cars until somebody got out.

Let’s revisit that stat: 65% of King County residents (that’s Metro Seattle) voted for John Kerry in ’04, ostensibly because he is of the more “compassionate” Left. Out of the easily 100 cars that passed this unfortunate trio even before Trooper Triplett arrived, don’t you think at least ONE of the 65 “compassionate” liberals that stats suggest ought to have driven by the accident might have stopped to help?

Hell no, they had planes to catch/jobs to tend to.

Damn liberals. And damn all King County drivers. Self-indulgent assbuckets, relying on the Nanny State to solve all problems.

H/T Rachel Lucas

Soviet of Seattle rediscovers phrenology, applies to Presidential race March 4, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Idiots, Soviet of Seattle.
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. . .will soon announce that using Phlogiston as a working theory of thermodynamics will solve the world energy crisis in a snap.

(For those of you who do not understand the theory of phrenology, it was a common discipline in the 19th century, where studying bumps on the human skull could allow for a clear determination about a person’s personality.  It was widely practiced and believed during much of the 1800s.)

 

Barack Obama: “His temples are slightly indented, which indicates that he may be compulsive about work, and needs regular exercise to de-stress. But it also shows he is highly disciplined, and that spirituality plays an important part in his life.

“His eyebrows show his tremendous drive and the ability to take on the difficult work … His lower eyelids indicate genuine care for other people. A mole near his nose indicates that this is a man with a special purpose in the world.”

Hillary Rodham Clinton: “Overall, the most impressive information seen in her face is how deeply she really cares about others and how she wants to help people; she views the country as one family. There are so many places on her face which reveal that her main motivation in her work is to help others. …

“The shape of her face shows tremendous strength … Hillary’s forehead indicates she’s very creative in problem-solving. … Her cheeks reveal both a strength and a challenge — her inherent desire to speak her mind. Her prominent cheeks are the feature that can make some men have a negative reaction to her, as subliminally they’ll feel she’s an overpowering and threatening woman.”

John McCain: “The most important feature on his face is his very heavy prominent jaw. But his jaw is not the strong, well-defined jaw that reflects good ‘roots of the tree’ — … the strong belief system. His jaw is quite massive and full. This shows firm values and beliefs, but more than that, it reveals someone who holds huge potential for anger and control.

“This feature, combined with his somewhat narrowed deep-set eyes show he is not so comfortable expressing his emotions, and he will need to suppress his feelings until be explodes into anger or upset.”

The Pacific Northwest, home of the most advanced thinking on earth.

HT: Mark Shea.

That’s it, I have officially become a full-fledged WSU Cougar fan January 29, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Cultural Pessimism, Idiots, Soviet of Seattle, Sports.
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UW has fallen off my list of acceptable schools.  The place is a rat’s nest; Todd Turner the former AD, tried to right the ship and has been since fired for not securing enough wins; current football coach Ty Willingham is on the hot seat for the same reason.

Money quote:

As one wrote on this seattletimes.com poll: “Nice guy Ty but in over his head. Nice guys finish last. UW deserves better.”

Well, you imbecile, let’s see what you get when you secure what UW better deserves.

Convicted of assault and accused of rape, star player received raft of second chances

That is current Tampa Bay tight end Jerramy Stevens, former Husky (NOT a graduate, despite his claims) who has multiple raps for DUI, rape and parole violation.

The man is an out-of-control scumbag who was enabled by the UW, its coach, boosters and administration.  The UW went so far as to try to “out” the name of the freshmen woman he was accused of raping in 2000, simply to pressure the poor girl into calling off her civil lawsuit against the UW, as King County prosecutor Norm Maleng wouldn’t press charges against the star Husky tight end.

To hell with the UW, Tampa Bay, Husky football and King County justice.  Seattle sucks.  The only people there worth rooting for are the Mariners, suffering Sonic fans, Mike Holmgren and Ty Willingham, who is gonna get axed next year for not winning enough and the UW and it’s idiot boosters can then bring in another win-at-all-costs coach.

GO COUGS!!!!!!

This. Is. Absolutely. PRICELESS!!! January 15, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Humor, Idiots, Soviet of Seattle.
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The tagline is almost the best part:

The City of Seattle.  Always on the cutting edge of saying “NO! in America.”

LINK THAT YOU SIMPLY MUST CLICK (particularly if you live anywhere in Washington State)

King County forcing residents to maintain dirty cars December 14, 2007

Posted by Administrator in Cultural Pessimism, Soviet of Seattle.
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LINK

In King County, Wash., local officials are mulling a move to prohibit residents from washing their cars on the street over concerns that the runoff is sloshing into Puget Sound.

I’m looking for source material, but right now it is difficult to come by via Google.

Yet, no one should be surprised at this latest effort on the part of the Soviet of Seattle to control the lives of its serfs residents.   In the pursuit of Heaven on Earth, the Politburo of Seattle must control all aspects of civilian life.

you just want to rule over everybody’s lives

-Genesis, Living Forever

Soviet Seattleites prove once again why the Berlin Wall fell; June 15, 2007

Posted by Administrator in Liberal self-loathing, Soviet of Seattle.
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. . .the system in no way condones common sense.

Mark Shea provides an example:

Every once in a while, there are collisions between various aggrieved peoples, which make the suffering they must endure all the more terrible. For instance, a few years ago Native Americans in Washington State (members of one of the highest-ranking Approved Victim Groups) decided they wanted to revive the ancient sacred mystical ancestral tradition of going out in a power boat with echo locators and lots of high-tech gear to kill a whale.

This presented the sensitive people in western Washington with an apparently insoluble conundrum: If the local media complained about the murder of our cetacean brethren suckling at the breast of Gaia, they would be imposing their Dead White European Male Cultural Hegemony on the bleeding wounds of suffering Native Americans! The depths of pain that could well up in the Native American community made strong editorial writers and TV pundits blanch with terror. But if the Manufacturers of Culture in Seattle media didn’t complain, they would be letting Free Willy die at the hands of evil predatory Homo sapiens who have been raping Gaia for eons. The high-pitched cry of pain from the Green Community would be audible to our mammalian animal companions for miles. We would once again have failed to act while our Mother Earth was taken one step closer to extinction by the defiling disease that is humanity!

At last, after much deliberation in closed-door sessions, the hierarchy of values was clarified by the arbiters of correct sensitivity: Native Americans trump Euro-Americans, but whales trump all humans. Accordingly, media reports were filled with cries of anguish from the Green Community on behalf of outraged whales, but there was a moratorium on reports about Native Americans outraged over chardonnay-sipping Euro-American TV pundits telling Native Americans how to run their lives. Instead, Euro-American critics of Native American environmental destruction would only be reviled for their cultural imperialism and insensitivity when they were white sports fishermen complaining that Indian gill netters were indiscriminately denuding the rivers of all fish. For as everyone knows, people who hunt and fish for sport are a form of life lower than Neanderthals, murdering Mother Earth for the sheer pleasure of killing. No one cares what they think. Problem solved.

Imbecility level of the Soviet of Seattle now established (and further proven by this foolishness), on to the next level of idiocy:

City of Seattle may ban microwave popcorn

10:36 AM PDT on Thursday, June 14, 2007

By ROBERT MAK / KING 5 News

 

AP

SEATTLE – At Seattle City Hall there are rules.

No weapons, no animals, no loitering, no alcohol, no lying down, no smoking, no music, no fighting, no trespassing.

Could the next thing be no microwave popcorn?

“It can be a significant problem in the future,” says Seattle Facilities Director Pedro Vasquez.

The City Facilities Department has just issued a memo to all City employees.

SUBJECT: Burnt microwave popcorn.

The Justice Center has been evacuated eight times in three years, forcing the evacuation of more than 400 people. If the problem continues, it will result in a ban of all microwave popcorn.

How has it happened so many times?

“I really don’t know, I can’t answer that question for you,” says Yolande Williams, City Court Administrator. (Of course she can’t. She’s a government employee-ed.)

The biggest offenders are at the Justice Center, but overheated popcorn has also forced evacuations at the Municipal Tower.

Popcorn is not the easiest thing to cook. Who knows if it’s really two, two-and-a-half or three minutes? An unsupervised bag can destroy productivity for all your co-workers.

But just the mention of a possible ban at city offices gets a number of responses.

“Perhaps what would happen is there’d be an underground market for microwave popcorn, people would sneak the microwaves into their offices, they’d do illicit popping,” says Frank Video, a staff member for the Seattle City Council.

Is it possible that if popcorn is outlawed, only the outlaws will have popcorn?

“You know, it’s not something that we have talked about in that much detail yet,” says Vasquez.

A spokesman for Mayor Greg Nickels says the Mayor does not eat popcorn.

The City just wants employees to follow this simple rule: Listen to the pop to know when to stop.

The Facilities director admits even his wife has burned a bag or two.

“She hit the popcorn button that had an automatic time associated with it and the popcorn still burned,” says Vasquez, who says even though it happened at his home, he did not ban popcorn.

Popcorn experts tell us the rule is very simple: When the popping slows to one or two seconds between pops, stop the microwave.

That’s your common sense tip of the day.

Problem is, no one in leadership in the Soviet of Seattle has any common sense. It’s an unknown concept anymore. And this lack of common sense, as illustrated first by incompetent city workers who torch popcorn bags, then further by automatic alarm systems that crap their pants at the drop of a burnt match, to developmentally challenged administrators whose response to this absolutely trifling annoyance is predictably knee jerk; The Big Stick:”Thou Shalt Not Cook Popcorn;” all of this shows a leadership convinced that people are imbeciles. And given who they are and who they work with, I guess I can’t be surprised.

But it does tend to be exceedingly annoying to those of us who CAN count to ten and keep breathing at the same time when these incompetent trolls proceed to legislate as though the entire state shares their minus-70 IQ. In this state, you are assumed incapable of:

Riding a motorcycle intelligently(MUST wear a helmet)

Determining when kids cannot be out of car seats (could be as old as 16 in this idiot state before you can finally sit like the Big People. I want you to imagine your HS freshman in a booster seat. See how well that will fly in Baltimore)

Talking and driving at the same time.

I like this last one, save for the lying legislator language. See, if you get pulled over for speeding AND were yakking on your cellphone at the same time, you will get a $101 ticket for the phone violation. It’s called a “secondary violation”, one that by itself should not result in getting a ticket.

But they’re lying bastards.

See, about 7 years ago, the Soviet passed a mandatory seatbelt law, but promised that it would always and forever be a secondary violation. You could never get cited for no seat belt alone.

Horsefeathers. 4 years ago, they started nailing people all over for not wearing a seat belt. You watch. The same thing will happen with the cell phones within 5 years.

So, the idiocy of the Soviet entrenches tendencies towards idiocy in its population.

Plus c’a change, plus c’e la meme chose.