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Political Correctness Invades Safeco Field July 25, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Humor, Idiots, Soviet of Seattle, Sports, wtf?.
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Peanuts to be banned in two sections of Seattle’s Safeco field.

Words fail me, but they do not fail Intern Bill of The BigLead.

In case you’re worried about some people saying that you’re raising a bunch of completely sheltered, overmedicated freaks, we’re here to say “that’s OK!” Because we here at Safeco Field know that when you have a kid who is really just an obnoxious moron, we call it “Asperger’s Syndrome.” It saves you from the needless discomfort of actually disciplining your kids. When you have a girl who is just a little on the chunky side, we say that she’s got “Celiac Disease,” and she needs to watch her gluten intake. We wouldn’t want to call her fat, hide the ice cream, and strategically place issues of Seventeen magazine in her room, because that might not be good for her self-esteem. And finally, when your little vag-dumpling is so highly-medicated that he/she/or-whatever-gender-they’re-free-to-choose are walking around like Zach Braff in the 1st part of Garden State, they might be zombies and wearing weird eye makeup, but at least they won’t be offending anyone!

The Seattle Mariners! Last place in the standings, and last place in life! It’s called “SAFE-co Field” for a reason!

The Seattle Cavaliers? July 24, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Idiots, Sports.
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A very funny post by the boys at Money Shot.

Long story short:  Cav’s fail to retain King James.  LeBron bolts, followed by 30-win season and many empty Cleveland seats.  Stern then steps in in an effort to save his boo-foo buddy good friend Clay Bennett $30 million and arranges for the Cavs to move to Seattle.

Frankly, not an implausible scenario, but I’d rather not see the heart ripped out of Cleveland, and would much rather see King James retire a lifetime Cavalier.

Not a key quote, but damned funny:

Let’s start from the top. We all know that David Stern (best picture ever) permitted Clay Bennett (sack of goat feces) to buy the Sonics eventhough he had the full intention of moving the team to Texas’s Hat.

On top of that, did you hear how longtime Sonic announcer Kevin Calabro told Bennett to f-off? He’s staying in Seattle to broadcast Sounder soccer (a very difficult task.  Soccer is fun to watch but B-O-R-I-N-G to listen to on the radio.  That tells you how much Calabro loves Seattle and loathes Bennett).

Calabro told Seattle P-I columnist Jim Moore in a July 9 article that the team formerly known as the Sonics, now reportedly called the Oklahoma City Thunder, offered him a job in their new home.

He said the basketball team offered “top, top dollar,” but Calabro is too happy in the Pacific Northwest.

I’d like to see a fight-to-the-death wrestling match between Paul Myers and Clay Assface Bennett.

Are Clay Bennett and David Stern Secret Lovers? July 9, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Idiots, Law, Soviet of Seattle, Sports.
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. . .or does Bennett have some incredible blackmail information on the NBA Commissioner?

Bennett began his “good faith” effort at keeping the Sonics in Seattle by demanding that government/taxpayers pony up $500 million to build a new palace in suburban Seattle.  That would be the richest of its kind in the nation.

Stern claimed that this had to happen for basketball to stay in Seattle, as KeyArena -despite having been remodeled to the specifications of the Sonics -is supposedly so inimicable to NBA owners basketball.  Stern claimed there was no other option, not even remodeling Key would do.

Then, as Seattle Gasbag Mayor Nickels looked for some way out of a lawsuit that most people were sure he would win going in -but in hiring incompetent attorneys screwed himself and the city-, and was agonizing over the fury of outraged hoops fans as the Sonics were hijacked to OKC, Stern then came oiling in and said that a $300 million remodel of Key would do the job.  Nickels, desperate for some sop to the voters in an election year, then took the $45 million from the smirking Bennett.

Stern backs Bennett in every instance.

NOW Bennett is facing the ex-owner of the Sonics, Howard Schultz in a tussle over ownership, claiming that Bennett did no exercise good faith in negotiating with the City.

Well, Schultz is probably correct.  But as Thomas More reminded us:

The world must construe according to its wits.  This court must construe according to the law.”

And in the law, “good faith” is one damned hard term to nail down.  We ALL know Bennett didn’t act in good faith.  You know it.  I know it.  Schultz, the trial lawyers, judges, David Stern, hell, even Clay Bennett knows it.  But they have a snowball’s chance in hell of proving that according to the law.

But that isn’t enough.  Either Bennett and Stern have been getting down in S&M clubs like the recently disgraced chief of F1 racing and they are all agog over one another, or Bennett reminded Stern of those compromising photographs or whatever he is using to leverage Stern and Stern has responded like a good lapdog.  The NBA is intervening in the Schultz lawsuit.

The NBA wants to intervene in former SuperSonics owner Howard Schultz’s bid to regain control of the team, claiming it would interfere with the stable operation of the franchise.

Schultz is trying to reverse his 2006 sale of the NBA franchise to Clay Bennett, claiming the Oklahoma City businessman failed to follow through on a promise to negotiate in good faith to keep the team in Seattle.

The league filed a motion Tuesday to intervene in Schultz’s lawsuit in Seattle’s federal court.

(snip)

That agreement included a clause that the deal would be broken and the team would return to Seattle if Schultz, the chairman of Starbucks Corp., were to prevail in this lawsuit, filed April 22.

(snip)

The NBA claims in its motion that the transfer of the franchise to a court-appointed receiver and a subsequent transfer back to Schultz would both be prohibited by the league’s constitution. (So the NBA trumps US civil law.  Fascinating -ed.)

The motion also claims that if a court-appointed receiver were to be appointed, the NBA’s constitution allows for the league’s owners to put that team “under the management and control” of commissioner David Stern.

“The relief requested by plaintiffs is entirely inconsistent with these reasonable and lawful regulations of the NBA, and the disposition of this action therefore threatens the ability of the League to protect its justifiable interests,” attorney Ralph Palumbo wrote in the motion.

The NBA also claims that Schultz’s ownership group signed a release as part of the league’s approval of the 2006 sale that prevented the former owners from suing Bennett’s Professional Basketball Club ownership group.

Stern left Seattle to twist in the wind, but whenever Clay Bennett needs help, Stern the Lapdog is right there to provide fellatio relief.

What is UP between those two?

Sonic linkfest July 3, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Cultural Pessimism, Idiots, Sports.
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Check ’em all. Good, heartrending and sometimes blood-boiling stuff.

Steve Kelley. Art Thiel. Truehoop and how maybe Seattle won’t get to keep much of anything at all. More Truehoop again and the wailing and gnashing of teeth of the fans, such as Sherman Alexie:

I cannot live with the thought that the Oklahoma City guys can hang retired Sonics jerseys in their rafters if they so choose. I would only hope that Bennett and the gang are not cruel enough to do that; and if they are, I can only that the players with those retired jerseys publicly protest it.

Bad news, my reservation friend. Bennett is exactly that cruel. He’ll screw this over too just to stick it further to Greg “spineless jellyfish gasbag” Nickels.

Kevin Jackson. with a grim reality check that anyone’s team can be moved, no matter the local support. The only support team owners are interested in is taxpayer extorted supported arenas. J. A. AdandeJim Caple.

And let me vent for just a moment on cnnsi.com’s coverage:

It SUCKS. All the links above I got from espn.com. Yes, I know there are sportsbloggers out there who think it is the Wal-Mart of sports reportage, but dammit, they thoroughly covered this story, while all SI ran was the two main AP articles.

Idiot gasbag folds, allows felonious assbucket to steal the Sonics UPDATED July 2, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Idiots, Soviet of Seattle, Sports.
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Nickels (gasbag mayor of Seattle) and Bennett (felonious assbucket) have agreed to a $75 million deal to allow the Sonics to bolt to OKC effectively pretty much immediately.

Clay Bennett has done it. He has stolen the Sonics and turned them into the OKC Raiders.

I had said previously that both of these guys suck. Nothing has changed.

UPDATE:

Lester Munson of espn.com:

Q: Why would Seattle settle? Why wouldn’t the city wait for the judge’s decision, hoping to keep the team for two years?

A: Before the six-day trial, Bennett was willing to pay $26 million to buy his way out of the lease. After the six-day trial, he increased his offer to $45 million. It could go up another $30 million in five years if the state of Washington authorizes at least $75 million in public funding to renovate KeyArena but Seattle is unable to obtain an NBA franchise of its own. Bennett increased his offer by nearly $20 million after watching both the city’s lawyers and his lawyers score some points in the trial. Bennett clearly thought there was a chance that he would be forced to stay in Seattle and was willing to pay a high price in settlement.

Although they had a powerful legal position in the language of the arena lease, mayor Greg Nickels and Seattle’s city council somehow reached the conclusion that $45 million was preferable to two years of lame-duck NBA basketball and $11 million in rent from Bennett. Most legal experts predicted that the city would have prevailed and could have held the team in Seattle for two years.

Nickels and the city hope that Seattle will somehow qualify for another NBA franchise. But, after arguing that no sum of money could replace two years of Sonics basketball, they gave away their team for a modest sum of money. It will become more of a political issue than a legal issue as Nickels and the council members face re-election.

Q: The settlement agreement includes a “negotiated statement” from NBA commissioner David Stern on “the future of professional basketball in Seattle.” What, if anything, does this mean?

A: If the choices are “meaningful” or “meaningless,” the Stern statement is meaningless.

Mayor Nickels and the city council needed something to try to show that their betrayal of Sonics fans was not a total betrayal. They needed something reassuring and hopeful in the face of what many fans thought was a disaster. The NBA was already involved in the discussions, assisting and advising Bennett on his exit from Seattle — given that, it was easy to ask Stern to say something for the fans in Seattle.

(snip)

The statement reiterates the position the NBA has argued since the controversy began. Seattle is, of course, a “first-class NBA city,” Stern said. It is so fine a city that its team is leaving for Oklahoma City.

Stern also repeated his demand for a $300 million renovation of KeyArena before the NBA will consider a return to Seattle. And he added that it must be funded in the next 18 months. Then, and only then, Stern says, the NBA will keep Seattle “informed” if there is a sale of a team, a relocation of a team or an expansion team.

Mayor Nickels will use the statement to defend his settlement, but that will be its only meaningful use.

Nickels is a gasbag who allowed himself to get played by Bennett, the Assbucket of the Year, while Stern, the main asskisser in this low-rent tragedy continues to pillory Seattle for not ponying up the requisite blackmail money.

There is NO ONE in this drama worth rooting for.

And more, really good stuff, from JA Adande, who is in a fine state of piss-off, while saying all the right things.

Henry Abbot.

The only reason to watch this year’s election is the slim hope a man’s head might explode July 1, 2008

Posted by Administrator in atheism, Humor, Idiots, Liberal Hypocrisy, Pharyngulism, Politics, Sports, Stupid Party vs Evil Party.
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Seems that Obama is considering expanding the faith-based initiatives started by GW Bush. Right now, this is the ONLY thing about Obama that I can stand. I still won’t vote for the guy, though. However, what might cause me to vote for the Obamanator is the possibility of watching noted atheist moron PZ Myers’s head explode, as the committed Democrat will have to hold his nose and vote for a politician that -in terms of lip service, at least- is in favor of expanding aid to religious institutions.

He’s still proposing an expansion of Bush’s faith-based initiatives — he’s going to be handing out billions of dollars to religious organizations. It’s nice that he’s specifically saying there will be restrictions, that the money can’t be used in programs that discriminate, and it must be for secular purposes, but he’s still propping up a religious middleman between government aid and the people, and that’s a tool that will be used to proselytize indirectly, even if they don’t simply flout the rules. This is a bad idea.

Well, it’s a bad idea only when you’re an atheist nutjob who sees radical religious conspiracies under every collection plate. WHEN will this bearded blowhard come to terms with his fear of God? If he will simply admit that he is terrified that his Lutheran upbringing was possibly correct, then he can come to terms with it like a good Freudian misfit, and live his life out in fearful quiet in the wilds of Minnesota.

Ain’t likely.

So, as a consolation, I do get to see him become agitated about this Obama/faith-based initiative sop to the religious of America. Twill be amusing to watch PZ get all atwitter about this. NOTHING else at this point is worth paying attention to in this wretched election year.

The SuperSonic Suit June 16, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Humor, Idiots, Sports.
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What we have here is an assbucket of the first water:

. . .that would be Clay Bennett, principal owner of the OKC Raiders Seattle Sonics.  Said assbucket is being sued by the City of Seattle, which is ruled in principle by this gasbag:

That would be Greg Nickels, the Mayor of Seattle.

Seattle is suing Bennett because Bennett bought the Sonics with the intent of moving them to OKC as soon as possible.  Seattle is hoping to force Bennett and his cronies to keep the Sonics in Seattle another two years, the length of their lease with the City on Key Arena.

Lester Munson thinks Bennett is in deep water:

In the lease between Seattle and the Sonics, the contractual language appears to be strong enough. The contract was written in anticipation of the team trying to move and the city trying to stop the move. The key sentence is this: “The obligations of the parties to this agreement are unique in nature; This agreement may be specifically enforced by either party.” The key word in this key sentence is “unique.” Both sides agreed when they signed the lease in 1994 that the presence of NBA basketball in the city’s arena was irreplaceable. They agreed there was no sum of money that could replace the Sonics for the 15 years of the lease. Because city lawyers anticipated the current situation when they negotiated and signed the lease, the city’s position is strong. It is hard to see how Bennett and his OKC crew could avoid playing two more seasons in Seattle.

Heh heh heh.  Bennett, of course, claims that the city doesn’t care about the Sonics.

Munson responds:

They will try to compare the support in Oklahoma City with the declining support in Seattle, asserting that they are entitled to go where it is profitable. Some of it will qualify as evidence that counts in the outcome, but some of it will not. Much of the decline in fan interest in Seattle likely can be attributed to the team’s worst-ever 20-62 record last season and to Bennett’s attempts to abandon the city. (my bold font -ed)

Then waiting in the wings is the idiot Howard Schultz, who inflicted Bennett on Seattle by selling the Sonics to the highest Assbucket bidder, accepting at face value Bennett’s bullshit claims that he would do everything he could to keep basketball in Seattle.

(Bennett) faces not only the lease that probably will keep him in Seattle as a lame duck for two more seasons but also other lawsuits. The most interesting is (Starbuck’s CEO Howard) Schultz’s attempt to take the team back from Bennett and his group and resell it to what Schultz calls an “honest buyer.” None of the other owners who moved their teams as free agents faced anything quite like the Schultz attack. Although Bennett claimed at the time he purchased the team from Schultz that he intended to try to keep the team in Seattle, a series of damaging e-mails has surfaced that indicates Bennett always thought he was a free agent and was preparing to move from day one. If Pechman rules for Seattle and against Bennett, Schultz will have two years to succeed in recapturing the team and selling it to a group that will keep it in Seattle. Bennett might be further from free agency than the average rookie.

We’ll be watching this suit very closely.  Too bad one of the twerps up above has to win.  Every one of them, Bennett, Nickels and Schultz are asshats.  But I guess Bennett is the biggest of them all.

Working Class Celtics Maul Glittery Lakers June 13, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Sports.
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HEEEElarious.

Down 21 points to end the first quarter, the Celtics eventually roar back to beat the loathesome lakers 97-91 at the Staples Center.

Suh-WEEET!!!

Then there is the LATimes post-morta: Bill Plaschke, and TJ Simers

I am not a big Boston sports fan, save for this:  They have put the hurt, a terminal hurt, on two of the biggest franchises in sports the past five years.  First forcing upon the Yankees The Biggest Choke In History back in 2004 as the Red Sox made their final march to end Babe Ruth’s Curse.  And now the Celtics have done the same to the detestable Lakers. 

Part of this is due to the fact that Doc Rivers, universally reviled as Celtic coach for years, has been schooling the ZenMaster himself, Phil Jackson.  Best evidence for this?  In quarters 1,2 and 4 of this series, LA has outscored Boston by 27 points.  But in the 3rd, when the players have just been thoroughly coached?  The Celtics are crushing the Lakers 116-73.  31-15 last night. 

That’s sound coaching, no matter how inept Doc has looked in the past, he has the Touch now.

Moving on to quotes, the asshat Kobe Bryant provides the best one:

“We just wet the bed,” Kobe said. “A nice big one, too. One of the ones you can’t put a towel over. It was terrible.”

Then there’s THIS one from Bill Simmons:

And while we’re here, let’s just say MJ’s teams never blew a 24-point lead at home in the Finals. I’m throwing it out there now.

And:

The Kobe-MJ thing … done. Over. Jordan never would have let that happen in the Finals. Ever. Under any circumstances. Nobody is ever allowed to bring this up again.

Um, yeah.  Kobe was supposed to be the next MJ, or perhaps BETTER than MJ.

 

*chortling*

I am LOVING sports life just now.

The WIAA is peopled by bleeptards UPDATED June 6, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Education, Idiots, Sports.
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“There never was a rule that didn’t have to be broken at some time, and the man who doesn’t know when to break a rule is a fearful pain in the neck.” –William Feather

 

First, there was the Archbishop Murphy fiasco from this last fall.

In brief: Archbishop Murphy High School fields a killer football team this past fall. After two games I think it was, Murphy’s coach, Terry Ennis, died after a long battle with cancer, though this death was somewhat unexpected. Rich Stubrud, Ennis’ brother-in-law, took over the reins and Murphy ran the table, 10-0 going into the first round of the playoffs.

It is at this point that Murphy finally discovered that one of their players failed to turn in his physical form before the season started. By Washington Interscholastic Athletic Association (WIAA) rules, this rendered the player ineligible, and any games he played in (all 10 of them) forfeit. Ennis had been responsible for managing this paperwork. But the incisive reader will note that he got terminally sidetracked -literally- in managing that paperwork.

Archbishop Murphy then self-reported to the WIAA, expecting a little leniency. I mean, dead coach and all.

Nope. The WIAA forced Murphy to forfeit all their games and disqualified them from the state playoffs.

Bunch of hidebound, clueless, thoughtless robots over at WIAA. To make things more outrageous, they changed the rule after this episode, but still left Murphy to swing in the wind.

This was so outrageous, even Rick Reilly sounded off on it, calling the WIAA a bunch of asshats. (copied in its scathing entirety here. I discovered this newest idiocy via Rhymes with Right)

That’s how the WIAA started the year. Now, let’s look and see how these asshats end the year:

The state’s governing body for high-school sports again finds itself stuck between its rules and what many consider common sense.

This time, the Washington Interscholastic Activities Association faces a protest from Nicole Cochran, a senior at Bellarmine Prep of Tacoma. Cochran finished more than three seconds faster than her competition in the girls 3,200-meter run at the Class 4A state track and field meet in Pasco, but she was disqualified after an official flagged her for running on the inside lane line.

One problem: a video shows she didn’t do it.

“I’m still in a little bit of shock,” Cochran said Thursday afternoon. “That’s pretty much all everyone can talk about.”

The video — which shows that a Bellarmine Prep teammate, not Cochran, stepped on the inside lane line — was shot by flotrack.com, a track Web site. Since the event’s controversial finish late Friday night, the video has circulated throughout the state’s track community, triggering many to call for the WIAA to reverse the disqualification and name Cochran the winner.

That, WIAA executive director Mike Colbrese said, isn’t likely to happen. (there’s a big effing surprise -ed)

He said the WIAA must follow the rules of the National Federation of State High School Associations, which prohibits the use of unauthorized video for reviews. In addition, the race official’s ruling is considered a judgment call, which Colbrese said is non-reviewable. (link)

Oh f***ing BULLSHIT. Of COURSE it’s reviewable. But once again, the WIAA, enslaved to their own rules, penalizes the innocent in defense of the indefensible.

People, it’s really simple. Rules are designed to serve the people, not the other way around. When rules become of paramount importance, you get enslavement and neuroses. It is no surprise that Orthodox Jews, who are the most hidebound and rule-enslaved people on Earth also have the highest cultural incidence rate of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. Why do they do what they do? Because the rules say so. That’s all.

Fricking WIAA wants to become the Orthodox Jews of the high school athletic world.

Although does anyone find it interesting that in both cases, a Catholic school got screwed over? Archbishop Murphy: Catholic high school in Mill Creek, WA. Bellarmine Prep? Jesuit, Catholic high school in South Seattle.

Just sayin’.

And before any asshat liberal douchebucket wants to start slamming Catholicism with the same breath, read your Catechism first and get a real idea of what the Catholic faith is all about before you start babbling out of your ass. Anyone going there will get deleted. Don’t even start.

UPDATE: My ubiquitous, clandestine informants tell me that the Cochran disqualification was overturned, and she is the rightful state champion.

That’s good to see, but still, the WIAA is still only 1/2 here; 1 for common sense, and one for idiot, hidebound rule-mongering.  That’s a 50% success rate, and in the classroom, that spells FAIL.

The Mariners Suck This Year. May 25, 2008

Posted by Administrator in Sports.
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Huge.  GM Bill Bavasai spent $116 million on a team that is last in the American League and has given up 30 runs in the last 6 games.

Yee hah.  They just got swept by the Yankees, in part by gagging in the 8th.

See USS Mariner for more than you could possibly want in terms of post mortem examination of this disastrous team.  We can only hope that Bavasi and manager John McClaren are gone, and that right quickly.

Team President Chuck Armstrong says this is the fault of the players on the field.  They ain’t working hard enough.

  1. Way to motivate those players, Chuck, and
  2. If my co-workers sucked eggs on ice, I don’t think the board chair would be saying that it isn’t the principal’s fault.  It’s his job to motivate, just as it’s McClaren’s job to motivate the M’s.  And that ain’t happening.